Sunday, December 12, 2010

Life is weird~

  I feel so depressed.I dont know why.My life seems like so empty.I had lost it.I dont know why,maybe this is the reply for what I have done before.People always say "world is round".yes,of course.Life is like a tyre,sometimes we are at top while sometimes we are at the bottom.




    But sometimes,I feel like the tyre of my life had been punctured.I feel like my life is always at the bottom.I know,the law of the world.You will get what you had done.You ll only get for what you had strived for.It depends on your effort.How would you put the effort will influence the outcome.This world is fair.Really?If yes,why there must be people flooded with money while at the other side,at the end of the world,there are people starving and die from day to day?


    When it comes to school holiday,instead of mountain of homework,yes,you will also feel the boringness.I do feel it,and even right now.I know you guys are doing 1000 works to deny it.We are denying the facts that the holidays are really boring.Oh god,Im just hoping that I would finish this school period as soon as possible.Yes,university life is much better.


    Wake up in the morning(yes,it is morning).I would think,"what I wanna do today?".Then,I would get the answer when looking to the unfinished homework on the desk.Ergh,it seems like


                                 Holiday=homework


     I have a friend.He is smoking.But what I feel weird is he is happy with his life.Coming home at the midnight.Hanging out.Do whatever he want.Nothing could stop him.He likes to "merempit" once upon a time.He also had pierced his ear(not advisable,dont try it at home).Once,he went to hostel.He broke the record.the record of school.He had been banned from that school.Then,when I meet him now,I could see the changes.He had started to go to the mosque(not  frequently),he also not "merempit" right now.He got his new fixed gear bicycle on his birthday(the cost is RM1000).He also start to wear "Aman Palestin" shirt.Sometimes he likes to go crazy that make us feel like want to laugh.Eventhough he didnt changed totally,but I could see the good side of him.


     Okay,honestly,Im in the mood of searching for my own personality.Im trying to be a bad guy.Like my friends.But I couldnt.I feel very awkward.When I see my friends are smoking and Im the only who is not smoking,it feels weird.I just think "how would they let the smoke go inside their lung?".Is it delicious?I dont know the answer.Then,When I tried to be a good guy or what people call it as "alim".I dont think Im able to do it.I ve live in islamic environment for 16 years.I had watched a lot of things inside it.There are too many what we call it as "tarikat" or the way you hold the religion.Sometimes,religion also could be politicised.Have you hears of "Masjid PKR"?Yes,I have heard it.And only PKRians could enter that mosque.What in the world?


    So,right now,my emotion is not that stable.I decided to hold the ISLAM in my own way.(not ayah pin eh).The most important thing is "mujahadah" and take the war inside yourself.Between bad or good.It depends on the environment.When you are in a good environment ie in school,it is okay.But it is hard when we are in bad environment ie when you are making friends with people in drug.First,you have to remind yourself.DOnt lose ur principle.Secondly,dont ever look at them wrongly.We have to approach them to bring them to back to "siratulmustaqim".






    Oh yeah,another thing.About crush.or a.k.a. LOVE.When we are talking about this.It is impossible for us to deny the fact that we had crush on someone.And me?Oh,I have one.(one okay!).Who?Just let it be a secret~ But,guys,When we are loving someone,the most important thing is belief.Okay,Im not a love dr.


    Sorry guys.Thanks for hearing my craps~ 

3 comments:

  1. feeling depressed is good coz that means u r still alive...
    if u didn't feel depressed,then what's the thrilling thing about being alive no???

    ReplyDelete
  2. Lol, a lot of grammar mistakes to say the,least, but overall I think your confused mind of being alim or not is very entertaining. I dont see you as the alim type nor as the wicked type, lol just be urself, that is naive

    ReplyDelete
  3. LOL~
    bro..are u supporting me or provoking ?
    okay Im sorry~
    I know it has a lot of mistakes.
    but at least Im trying right?
    anyway,Im sorry~im not in a good mood yet.

    ReplyDelete

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